Being alone

Are you the type of person who cannot move without having someone to go with them? Not because you are injured or disabled, but because you just can't stand to eat at a fast food alone. Why are some people naturally "independent" they can go to mass by themselves, or eat at McDonald's by his lonesome? I guess we all have different stories.

I used to dread being by myself. I wouldn't want to be caught dead alone. I needed my peers to be with me when I go shopping, or watch a movie, or eat. I also needed someone to be with me during enrollment, during applications, etc. I was young then, and peer acceptance is important to me.

Then I discovered that I cannot always like what I see. Sometimes your friends are late. Sometimes, they are not serious. Most often than not, you have different opinions. First adaptation would be to be understanding of them. Maybe God is testing your patience, or is teaching you a life lesson. But after endless giving, you realize, I'm not going anywhere with these guys! Got to do it myself. So you learn to enroll by yourself. You learn to eat by yourself in a food court. You learn to go shopping by yourself. It was lonely at first, but hey, that's growing up. I realize, I can't be relying on someone else all the time. This is where you become your own person.

Then being alone too long will take a toll. You are afraid to commit to someone, or you forget your lessons in understanding and giving - probably why there are a lot of people who are afraid of relationships. Others, did not go through being alone (either they are too afraid or just enjoy it too much) that they can't cross over to being in a commitment. And you need to learn so many things again. Back to zero.

What am I driving at? All of us has to go through this cycle of being in a flood of things, then establish his own identity, then being with that someone who is your soul mate. This cycle can exists everywhere - in school, in a romantic relationship, in the workplace, in communities. It is never ending. It is also unavoidable.

This is one example of how we grow. I grow. Now, being hardheaded to accept change is another story.